Monday, June 22, 2009

October 02, 2007

How To Survive An Affair

The Three Phases to Recovering from Infidelity
Individual Healing - Understanding Personal Healing and Sorting through Emotional Problems
Healing As a Couple - Working Together to Identify and Resolve Key Issues
Negotiating a Renewed Relationship - Understanding How to Rebuild and Sustain a New, Trust-filled Partnership
The Four Roadblocks to Healing After An Affair

Jealousy
Uncertainty
Shame
Loss of Hope

Ten Destructive Habits That Demolish Trust
Neglecting Your Partner
Angry Outbursts
Unfair Accusations
Constant Fighting
Taking Revenge
Disrespectful or Demeaning Comments
Nagging
Intentionally Engaging in Irritating Habits
Selfish Demands
Dishonesty.




October 03, 2007
Infidelity
is a symptom, just as a sore throat
admitted to the affair,
but yet he still continues to contact this person and has asked me to be patient. He said he will need to get her "out of his system" and to give him some time.
gradual process.

7th kind of affair I describe (I want to be close to someone...which means I can't stand intimacy), ending the affair often takes time. Yes! No! On again! Off again is the scenario.
Affairs also lollygag for those who are "in love"...and just love being "in love" or My Marriage Made me Do it.
expect a roller coaster ride
the "just friends" emotional affair:

This person often struggles knowing where to draw the line. S/he often throws him/herself into something 100%.
He/she struggles with intimacy. (I want to be close to someone, but don't like intimacy.)
Of course the "just friends" comment means either "stay away" or I'm, underneath all this, really confused about where I fit in relationships, what I want from them, or what they mean to me.A sad kind of "stuckness or lostness."
It usually takes 6 to 48 months to break free from the affair
What if One's Spouse Can't Reveal all the Details of an Affair?
Broken trust hurts, but the longer it goes on, the deeper the pain.
try justify to himself that if there has been a short affair, he should protect his partner from pain, and not tell
.

he/she is protecting himself from the anticipated pain of feeling guilt and the marriage breaking up because of the betrayal.
go ahead and rip the bandage off.

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